Willing Away Asthma and Hoping My Teeth Don't Fall Out
Please join me in manifesting my teeth not falling out
When I first got to Mexico at the end of November 2021 I immediately started having what seemed like severe asthma. Specifically, at night, my airways would close up, I couldn’t breathe, and my oxygen levels would get so low I’d feel like I was going to lose consciousness. Assuming I was just adjusting to a new environment, I got an albuterol inhaler, which barely helped and kept me up all night (inhalers spike adrenaline, FYI). Then I started getting a number of other symptoms like weakness, numbness, and neurological issues like trouble speaking, serious brain fog, etc. It got so bad I went to the ER and they prescribed me prednisone, a corticosteroid, to help me breathe.
After a month or so, I realized that the mattress I’d been sleeping on was full of mold. I got rid of the mattress, meticulously cleaned the entire room, got a new mattress and new bedding, and some of my symptoms got a bit better but the breathing issues at night remained. I figured maybe the mold spores had been spread throughout the apartment so I fully deep cleaned everything possible, but the breathing issues didn’t go away. Meanwhile, I was having the worst side effects from prednisone, a medication that does not work well with my body, but that I had no other choice to take if I wanted to get adequate oxygen to my brain.
It felt like I was in hell. I’d just sold most of my stuff and spent a week driving everything I owned to Mexico, only to get there and realize the place I was staying in was mold infested and making me ill.
When I described the situation to a person I trust quite a bit with health things, she brought up the idea that your lungs are where you store grief in Chinese medicine, and that potentially even with the mold out of my environment, my emotions could be causing me to stay stuck in this asthmatic state. I’m super open-minded when it comes to the mind-body connection and yet some part of me can’t help but be skeptical. Honestly, I don’t know why. I believe in aliens and miracles and that the location of the planets can tell you what will happen in your life, but a powerful emotion causing me constricted breathing? Hmm, might be a bridge too far.
I was so sure that my breathing problems were mold-related but eventually, I was willing to accept that I was in fact grieving since leaving my home in California and maybe it was partially responsible. During my nightly meditation, I started consciously setting the intention to release some of this grief. Surprisingly, the first night that I did it I noticed I was breathing easier.
So I did it again the next night. And the next night. Each night my pulse oximeter reading was higher. Then the fourth night, out of sheer curiosity, I didn’t do it, and the breathing issues came back but only about 50% as bad as they had been. The next night I did it again and my airways were fully open.
Somehow every time I explain this, or even just think about it by myself, it doesn’t feel real. How could this thing that was so bad I thought I might literally die in my sleep from oxygen deprivation be fixed by something as simple as emotional release? If someone else were telling me this, I’d probably think they were exaggerating or that maybe it was all a coincidence. Sorry, hypothetical person, but I’m just not that trusting sometimes.
That was a little over two months ago and now my breathing issues are completely gone and I’m slowly tapering off prednisone. Nothing has changed in my environment, other than just intentionally focusing on releasing grief.
This isn’t the first time I’ve come to believe emotions have a major impact on health. When I look back at the different health crises I’ve had over the years, there’s almost always been a real environmental or viral trigger combined with the very intense emotions of whatever is currently going on in my life. It wasn’t something I usually understood in the moment, but something I realize later on after going through my journal entries around the times I was sick and noticing that there was a lot going on internally.
Honestly, it makes a lot of sense. I don’t even know why I ever doubt the role emotions play. We’ve all had the experience of being so anxious that our muscles become rigid, our hearts drop into our stomachs, our breathing changes, we get numb and tingly, etc. Some of us have also felt that crazy-euphoric, heroin-like high at the beginning stages of a relationship where absolutely nothing can bring you down. (No? That’s not healthy and is actually a red flag? My bad.)
I’m almost finished reading The Mind-Body Prescription by Dr. John Sarno, a former professor at NYU’s medical school, which is full of all the wildest studies and stories of people who’ve eliminated debilitating, seemingly permanent health issues by addressing the emotional root of them. It’s a fascinating read that may change the way you see the body if you’re up for that kind of thing.
Anyway, on a personal victory note: I’m down from 40mg of prednisone a day to 4mg and should be off it completely by the end of the month. This might not seem like a big deal, but the side effects I’ve been living with have been no joke (the number of people who’ve spontaneously lost multiple teeth is shocking), and the withdrawal process of going off it after being on it long-term is nightmarish (think paralyzed in the fetal position, headache, throwing up, etc.) So I’m in the home stretch.
Breathing issues are gone ✅
Prednisone and the chance of losing my teeth are almost gone ✅
Feeling ready to regain some energy and get lots done ✅
Next stop: getting back to the US, going to Whole Foods, eating a Sweetgreen salad, crying, kissing the ground, and never ever leaving ✅
Cheers to Sweetgreen!